I don’t know about you, but every day is a different struggle with my mental health. Some days I can’t stop thinking about the same thought that is repeating itself over and over in my head. Other days I struggle going out into public places.
I am in Accounting Management for a very large and global company. I am lucky to work from home. Because with my mental health issues, I don’t honestly think I could handle being in an office environment; for several reasons.
I don’t like to sit on public seats and then come back into my home and sit on any surface in my house without changing my pants. Weird right? Yes, for some people it is and they can’t understand my thought process or reasoning for this. However, if I don’t do this or my husband doesn’t, I will mentally and physically become uncomfortable. Thoughts will start looping in my head and I can’t stop thinking about them. I will start breathing hard, my heart rate rises, and at times I shake. While other times I have a full blown panic attack and want to just rip my skin off because of the way if feels on my body. It is not just mentally uncomfortable to me, but sometimes it becomes truly physical as well.
My OCD has to do with germs, counting, rechecking things, and thoughts of unrealistic outcomes. To be honest I am sure there are many people that I work with daily, along with friends, and even family that aren’t even aware of this. Until now, if they read my blog, since I shared it with them all. That being said, there are so many people out there that live with these and other mental issues daily and they are afraid to speak up and talk to anyone about it.
We need to speak up. It affects your life on so many levels. It makes it difficult for family, spouses, and roommates that you live with. And if they love you, like my friends and family, all they want for you is to be happy and get the help that you need. Not everyone needs a therapist, but we all need to talk about it, even if it is one person in your life.